I Am Willing to Witness My Fear

Happy Sunday beautiful people.

Today, I embark on a 40-day journey! I have been reading everything by Gabrielle Bernstein, but yesterday, my cousin reached out to me and said she was starting the 40-Day challenge which follows along with Gabby's book, "May Cause Miracles." Surprisingly enough, my goal for the day yesterday was to go and find that book, even before my cousin had said anything! The synchronicity of the universe was incredible yesterday...

 Friday night, I couldn't fall asleep until 5 am, slept for about two hours... woke up and realized there are some aspects of my life that need to be altered. I read a chapter from 'Spirit Junkie', did the meditation at the end.... and found myself broken down, sobbing in my room... I asked for the universe to help guide me in the right direction, ready for change and willing to work... next thing you know I am out searching Aventura for this book. Funny to find out; there isn't a single book store in this part of town... I was distressed & to top things off, my car key got stuck in the ignition. I was in a state of panic, hungry & very annoyed. I sought to stress eating, despite my epiphany from the morning... I felt like this was the world's way of telling me, "NO. You aren't allowed to make this change, you can just keep on doing what you're doing." After hitting up multiple drive-thru's & stress eating my way to sickness... I stopped at a car-shop & asked a friendly worker to potentially help me. With a little struggle, the man got my key out... I felt a lot better but my brain was buzzing from the drive-thru binge eating, so I stopped by Goodwill to walk it off & see if I could find any bargains.. To my fortune, I found a pair of beige pumps, exactly what I've been wanting; problem, they were marked for 53 dollars. 53 dollars at Goodwill... what?! So I asked a clerk about them, she said... you know, that's wrong, these are 7, go up to the counter now and I'll make sure you get them for the right price. So, I walked away with a little pep in my step... the day was getting better. Exhaustion finally hit, so I decided to head home & nap.

 Upon waking up, I had a voicemail from my beautiful cousin who said she was starting the 40-Day Challenge the following day, Sunday, and that she would love if I would do it along with her. This was my call back from the universe. I am going to get better & I am going to be happy again. I sprung out of bed, drove 15 miles to the nearest Barnes & Noble, purchased the book (and several others) & knew that my journey to recovery & unlimited happiness would begin in the morning.


If you made it through all of that, some of you are probably thinking... what is this girl even talking about? If you'd like to know more, I can definitely expand upon it... but it's been a long few years that I am looking to find solace for.

Gabby's 'May Cause Miracles' is a day-by-day guidebook that makes subtle changes in your life to open the windows to true happiness, internal happiness & love over fear.

Today, I am willing to witness my fear: my fear that I will be forever alone, my fear of steering away from the calorie counting life I once followed, my fear that my body isn't perfect, or people don't like the way I am. I see what I've been through, and I will not be afraid of what I can become.

Today I begin this journey for me.